Things Are Getting Better

So....

I spoke to the dietician at the beginning of this week. I have made up my mind. I will NEVER speak to her again. I think that being a "dietician" is a fake profession anyhow. I mean, does one have to get an MS in Nutritional science to tell the fat kid (who's been dieting since age 6) that one pound is equal to 3500 calories? I think not.

Also, she always talks to me with a mouthful and boasts about how she is an avid runner and marathoner. It's sort of like having Satan as your cheerleader. It doesn't really work.

As for my surgeon (since my last post) he did exactly what I paid him to do. But he also has statistics that he must uphold (and I'm a rebel - totally killing his numbers) and lives by a publish or perish mentality. He's a cutter and as a cutter he is the one that is paid to fix the car not teach me how to drive it.

No more talking to that part of the team unless it is a medical emergency. I have however been posting to Vertical Sleeve Talk which is more suited to me than Obesity Help. I was so happy to find it because last Tuesday I really was going to see if I had learned to fly, yet...off a cliff.

My numbers this week are as follow...

Weight: 202 (down from 241.8)
Boobs: 43 (which still haven't budged)
Waist: 36
Hips: 48

Me, at Christmastime, before surgery. The discomfort in myself here is so appearant: the double chin, the swollen eyes...

Me, two nights ago....8.5 weeks post op. My eyes are brighter, I appear clearly happier,  and my double chin is nearly gone!

Lowered Expectations

I went  to see the surgeon yesterday for my first post op visit.

I felt awful when I left his office. I feel pretty comfortable saying that he is a mother fucker. Yup. That's right a complete and total asshole! More succinctly, a dick.

I walked in, weighed in at 210 and felt ok about it. Not jumping for joy, but not like I wanted to take a bath with a toaster either.

I waited for him to join me once I was roomed. Ten minutes later he walked in and the first thing out of his mouth was, "So, I see you haven't been following my eating prescription."

Now, a day later, several excellent things come into my mind that I wish I had thought of yesterday, such as, "Don't be an ass!" or "Be nice or leave." or my personal favorite "Yeah, I haven't. Instead, I've been slamming Ho Ho's and Ding Dong's."

Needless to say, I felt defeated. These past five and a half weeks have been a struggle both physically and emotionally.

I rallied the troops. Amy said just keep going and "he's a dick!" My sister said, "Write a letter even if you don't send it." And my husband, God bless him, went to Costco with me to look for new protein shakes becasue the doctor said I need a higher protein intake. Gah!

Before the surgery, the surgeon said I could reach 110.Yesterday, when I told him he said that he denied it and snidely asked, "What's your goal." I answered 130.

To be honest, at 5 feet tall and 210 lbs now, I'd be happy at 170 for the rest of my life. And perhaps I shouldn't put too much stock into what the surgeon says. Do I have to see him again?

Sometimes, I visit Melting Mama. It's a blog about WLS. I like it. Here is what I read today and it helped me resolve my heart and soul. It gave me solidarity. Meltimg Mama - Lowered Expectations.